More pre-release tunes

The free songs will be gone any day now, but here's another way you can, if you be interested thusly, sample some of my music before it hits the streets with a mad, riotous frenzy: go here and enjoy the super-sweet, sonically pristine, and oh-so-dependable myspace music player.

Maybe I'm just a proud dad, but...

... it sure seems like the kid's got talent.

Mo Sho? Fo Sho.

Here's a quick update on the TX house shows.

Oct 2 -- Bryan/College Station
Oct 4 -- Houston
Oct 6 -- Bryan/College Station
Oct 12-13 -- San Antonio (tentatively)
Oct 16 -- Bryan/College Station
Nov 10 -- Houston

I'll hopefully have Austin, Lufkin, and D/FW figured out by the end of the week.

Everything else (all the out of state stuff) is still the same as what i posted here and here.

Still trying to decide if I can fit Florida in this fall. Things ain't lookin' good, but I'm not giving up yet.

Also, I'll keep the free songs up for maybe 2-3 more days, but then I'm taking them down. Now that I've given you a few days to gloat to all your friends about the super-secret awesomeness of it all, feel free to link to it or tell anybody that you want, if you so desire. If you think there are people who will be more likely to spend money on my music after being given freebies, encourage them to check out the tunes. But be sure and warn them that "medicates" has a couple of awkward moments in it.

Hey, I think I should get points for writing/recording what is probably the first Jesus-loving song ever to talk about internet porn addiction.

Finally -- and this is really fun -- me and my 3-year-old son did a song at the Com Church Family Camp Talent show this weekend, and I got video of it. I'm going to try to get some of it on the blog later this week. Prepare to be stunned by the lethal combo of super-cuteness and weirdly-amazing-coolness that will emanate from my son when he throws down the drum thunder magic.

Post-finally (I just made that up), the CD is still on schedule for release sometime within the next 10-12 days. Go here to listen to 30-second clips (just went up this week) of all the songs that aren't free.

As promised:

Go here if you want two free songs from the new record, which will look like this:





PC people do this: Right click, choose "save target as" if you want to save it to your computer. Mac people do whatever it is you do...

Tell your friends. Or don't. But enjoy. And thanks for reading/supporting/encouraging.

Be looking for TX tour info later this week.

Organizationalizing

OK, first some news. Within a few days, I will post a link on this site that will take the readers of this site to a free download from the new, not-yet-released CD. I made that promise, and gosh darnit, I'm going to keep it. So be looking for that. I got the master back yesterday, so the song (or two) will go up as soon as I can get to it.

Second, here are the revised (and, hopefully, final) dates of the OK/KS/MO tour:

Sept 5 Edmond, OK
Sept 6 Stillwater, OK
Sept 7 Clever, MO
Sept 8-9 Wichita, KS
Sept 10 Tulsa, OK

The PA/MD dates are still the same.

I'm really eager to get the TX shows on the calendar. Here's my issue. Lots of folks want weekends. If you're in any of the TX areas that I've mentioned here, and you'd be willing to host on a weeknight, let me know. I only have so many weekends left, so I'm really going to have to do some weeknight shows if I want to hit all the spots that have shown interest.

Finally, on an unrelated note, my sister-in-law got me one of these:


and it absolutely RULES. I don't know what these things cost, because I didn't pay for this one, but the Starbuck's in my neighborhood is taking a major hit, as I have given my full allegiance and affection to this wonder of beverage technology. I daresay I have found the nectar of the gods.*

*The management and staff of rosskingworldtour in no way endorse pantheism, polytheism, or any other pagan "isms," and wish to affirm their orthodox and utterly benign religious leanings. Furthermore, the management and staff at rosskingworldtour affirm that there is but one God, and, to their knowledge, said God does not, officially or unofficially, endorse any beverage, be it nectar, juice, or any variety of liquid.

*Coffee is an addictive substance and must be consumed responsibly.

More Stories of the Airport

I wrote this yesterday while traveling, though it wasn't for a "gig." Again, I make no claims about how interesting this is. I had some time to kill, so I wrote:

The last time I did this, I was trying to get out of rural Mississippi, having an (apparently) inappropriate chuckle over the nasal deficiencies of large camo-clad Southerner. Big fun, you know? Make the best of a situation. Lemons into lemonade, frowns upside down, etc. Like that.

If I got even the least bit of sympathy last time, that’s not likely to happen here.

This time, I’m in Salt Lake City, proud home to what I believe is the looniest of all religions (sorry, can’t help but speaking the big quiet truth and all), returning from a 4-day trip with the male types from my wife’s family. Earlier this year, my wife went on a trip with her mom, sister, and sister-in-laws. They did a spa thing, complete with all that weirdness that dudes never understand – bathing in wet dirt and getting their feet mangled with scrapey rocks and such – and generally had a big time.

So my father-in-law, a big believer in equality and tit-for-tat and things of that nature, offered to take me and Staci’s two knothead brothers on a trip. What better destination than the Mormom-packed deserts of Utah? Nah, just kidding. We went to Lake Tahoe, CA. But SL City is our layover, and we got delayed on the way back home.

It was weird timing, honestly. Keith has been mixing my project while I'm gone, and the control freak in me is a little frantic and anxious about not being there, looking over his shoulder, messing with him while he works, saying "i can't hear the drums on the left side" and him saying "that's because you're nearly deaf in your left ear" (see fact#5). It's probably for the best that I left town.

The trip was, of course, amazing. I won’t bore you with the details, but it involved stuff like kayaking, hiking, laying around by the pool, a viewing of The Bourne Butt-Kickamatum, and various consumption (in biblically supportable moderation, of course) of delicious food and beverages. In short, I lived like a rich guy for nearly a whole week.

Just to remind us that regular life ain’t all hi-jinks and umbrella drinks, God has us delayed here for about 5 hours. If you haven’t been to a big-city airport in a while, you may not know that they’re basically designed for situations just like this. Most major airports are better than the mall in Lufkin, TX. I should know. I once got stranded there for about 4 hours, waiting for my wife to come thru town and pick me up. Long story, but it wasn’t pretty. Needless to say that I came out of that experience with a bad haircut and a top score on (at least) Galaga and Area 51. I mean, I owned the arcade in that place. I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised if there weren’t still some RSK’s perched atop several of those high score screens (Todd, check it and let me know). Hey, lemons into lemonade, you know? You make the best of it.

Plus, I’m an animal on the Galaga.

I’m getting off-track. I was trying to tell you that it’s not that bad being stuck in an airport. For some reason, this has me thinking about the fall, when I’ll be spending a good bit of time in airports and, likely, getting delayed from time to time.

Which, again, isn’t really all that bad. I mean, you’d always prefer to get where you’re going, but if you must be stranded, airports are okay (and, to be fair, so are mall arcades in East Texas). Most of them make you pay for internet, which I’m not about to do, but aside from that, there’s plenty to entertain you. I’m pretty sure CNN pays somebody, because there are always big TV’s up high on the walls giving you their version of the news. And there are all kinds of stores and restaurants and time-killing diversions.

And this is where I get to the very unimportant point of this particular entry.

I have several favorites. Not every airport has all of these things, but this can serve as my way of lobbying to that end.

Here are my top 10 favorite time-killers in the major airports of the world, in no particular order:

1) Starbucks: come on, I know it’s cooler to hate the big corporation, but I need my fix. I NEED IT!

2) Cinnabon: holy moley, what is in these things? There are very few people who I wouldn’t gladly karate chop in the throat to get my hands on an icing-covered treat from this place.

3) Brookstone/Sharper Image: don’t care which one. I always find a way to get some kind of free robotic massage kind of thing when I go in these stores. I have never bought a single thing at any one of them, but there are no signs saying “don’t put your foot in this contraption unless you can afford to buy it.” This, kids, is called a loophole, and I boldly jump thru it like a camel thru the eye of a massive, jumbo-size needle.

4)Smoothie Bar: there are several versions, the most common (as far as I can tell) being a place called The Grove. I’m no health nut, but sometimes, during a long day of travel, fruit-pretending-to-be-a-milkshake is the only way to purge the nasty travel sheen that stains the core of the sojourner.

5) Bookstore: I rarely buy books at these places, but when I do, it’s because I’m in desperate need. I’m pretty serious about the reading, and I’ve bought more than my share of Harlan Coben or Robert Ludlum in airport bookstores. And I’ve bought more entertainment magazines than I care to admit. I mean, if I’m jonesing for a Brangelina fix, I’d rather satisfy it in a place where nobody knows me. Don’t act like you don’t relate.

6) Bathroom: the bathrooms at airports are almost always clean, roomy, and well-lit. How many public bathrooms can boast of that? In addition, they are increasingly automated, hi-tech and (as much as possible) germ-conscious. Lots of hands-free devices and motion sensors and protective paper circles and whatnot. I won’t be crass (I mean, not anymore than I have been), but on a day that involves a lot of sitting and coffee consuming, a good, dependable bathroom haven is important. I’m just saying.

7) Not-nailed-down rows of connected chairs: if you’re lucky, you’ll find yourself in a spot with this little-known-about amenity. Of course you’ve sat in those welded-together chair-chains that are in every airport in the whole world, but they’re only unpleasant when they are connected to the floor by industrial bolts. When they aren’t, you can drag those suckers as far as you’re willing to, and put together a sleeping contraption of your own design. Once you’ve got it fully assembled you will, for a moment, feel as if you deserve your own Discovery Channel show. Then that moment will pass and you’ll fall into a fitful, cramp-inducing semi-sleep.

8) Arcade: these aren’t very common in airports anymore (which is dumb, because they’d get lots of my money and, therefore, a good chunk of my heart as well), but they are a treat when you can get them. I think I’ve already established that I am a 9th Level MegaWizard in the world of vintage video games. Is anybody surprised at this? I mean, nunchucks and comic books? This is the completion of my Nerd Trait Trifecta. I am not ashamed.

9) Automated Sidewalks: there are very few places where you can feel like you have superpowers (which is sad, I think). This genius of engineering is one. If you break into a full run on one of these things (which is totally easy to do because people are always running in airports), you will be momentarily transformed into a panther-quick superhero. Just be sure and slow down before you get to the end. If you step off this device at a full run, there will be consequences, and they will be ugly. Every Superman has his Kryptonite, and to Automated-Sidewalk-Man, it’s the regular, not-moving-at-all floor.

10) Starbucks: I know I already said it, but on a long layover/delay, I usually go twice. I have an addiction. I love the sweet, semi-narcotic ambrosia of the Americano, the Cappucino and, even (gasp!), the Macchiato. Say it with me. I am not ashamed.

Okay, that’s enough time wasted. Be on the lookout for more of these in coming months. There's no end to my prolificacy when I'm bored.

Also, this week I’ll update at least one more time. I’ve got more tour and CD news, but I’ve already taken too much of your time with this nonsense.

I’ll leave you with this. Next time you’re in a major airport, if you hear the sound of quarters bouncing and clashing together, and if you see a blurry, super-fast figure carrying a latte and a magazine with TomKat on the cover, you just may be in the presence of Automated Sidewalk Man. And he may be on his way to the arcade. Or he may be rushing desperately to find a clean, roomy, well-lit place. Either way, it’s best to just let him pass.

I’m just saying.

various miscellany

Coupla things that may be of interest to some of you.

First, the new CD is now available for pre-sale here. The release date is Sept 10 (maybe sooner, though), but you can go ahead and order one (or five) now. I'm excited. Go order one, or at least go look at the cool artwork done by AM Design.

Second, all of my CD projects, except for the new one, are now on iTunes. I'd link to it here, but that would only take you to the audiobooks page of an author who has the coolest name ever, and apparently deserves to have first claim to it. I'm bitter. Anyway, I've had a couple of records on there for a while, but my pal Britt Norvell helped me get the rest up this past week. Since a couple of my records are currently out of print, this is pretty much the only way to get them. Tell your friends. Buy lots of stuff.

Third, I've put most of my fall schedule on my website. It includes the house show tours, which are still being updated and planned, and also my worship gigs, as well as the Sundays when I'll be at Community Church.

Here's something cool. I have like 5-6 out-of-town worship gigs in the fall, and all of them but one are with Voddie Baucham. He's a good friend and, as many of you know, an amazing preacher/teacher. Between being with him several times and getting to plan my own tours, I'm getting really excited about my travels. It's still more "being gone" than I've had in a while, and I know it will be tough time away from my family, but I feel like very excited about it all.

Coupla mo things...
I'm still trying to figure out when/where to do all the Texas venues, but hopefully that will get worked out soon. I'm hoping to do shows in these great TX towns, and maybe a few others:

Bryan/College Station (of course)
D/FW
Houston
Austin
San Antonio
Lufkin (Todd? Chris? I haven't forgotten about you guys)

I also really want to try to figure out a second set of PA/NY/MD shows and, hopefully, the oft-mentioned-but-never-materialized Florida tour.

Sorry this post is only boring data, but not every post can have car wrecks and nunchucks.